"You Create Too Much Angst In People..."

Recently I was fired from my job. It was all conducted in the nicest possible fashion, becoming of a liberal "community-based" institution. I wasn't actually fired, but was "invite[d] to resign," because I "create too much angst in people." To be fair, I was told that there was "a file this thick" of complaints about me (I was lead to believe from students, colleagues, parents...); one or two vaguely-specified incidents were mentioned; to be even more fair, I'm surprised it took them this long to do it (I have been employed for five years and I do push it a it I must admit...), but in the end it had to be done - you can't have Philosophy teachers making people "feel angst." Ah, hang on a minute..."people"...before this goes any further, it probably should be said that the "people" in question were not student 'people' (if the petition against my "invitation to resign" is anything to go by at any rate), nor it is colleague "people" (if the amount of private e-mails and conversations is anything to go by). No, it is Senior Administrator "people."

You see, being a Philosophy teacher I have this irksome tendency to "speak truth to power," to use Foucault's phrase; I'm rather old-fashioned: I believe that those in charge of education should be intellectuals, should be up to the task, should be morally beyond reproach, should be critical thinkers, and should be capable of separating the intellectual from the personal. What matters in education is ideas. What matters in education is people. I believe Senior Administrators should be naive (in the best, original sense of the word) idealists. I also thus believe that one of my jobs is to point out to them when they are failing to be these things, and to do it in public. Let me be clearer: if they make public statements, the response should be public. To respond privately to public assertions is a failure of moral responsibility on the part of educators.

So, by doing so, I created "too much angst in people," and thus was "invite[d] to resign."

What follows is a series of my public responses to public e-mails, sent by Senior Administrators in the educational institution where I work. I shall try and provide context. Too much would be boring; too little would be unenlightening. Those of you who are my colleagues have, of course, already read them. Those of you who are not, and those of you who are not involved in education, may, if you read on, have a glimpse into the way educational institutions are being run. It will probably come as no surprise to you. It was a surprise to me, because I am a naive idealist.

E-MAIL 1
The school is currently on a 'green' kick. Lots of well-meaning, futile actions designed to 'ecologise' the school, 'greenwash' it, and infuse the whole thing with educational purpose. A colleague wrote that she had had a conversation with a Senior Administrator in charge of purchasing, and she had scored a "notable success." I replied:

""I informed Ibrahim and the leadership team about this. You will be happy to know that Ibrahim has kindly agreed to look into this more ecological and environmental-friendly affordable alternative for our garbage bags."
"Look into"? What does that mean? What is there to "look into"? The bloke who buys stuff is told that one brand of the stuff is cheaper than the other brand of stuff, and is better. What's to "look into"? "Look into", "take back to" (as in "take back to the leadership" for example), "consult with"....all sounds like institutional inertia to me...
Well done Else for doing the legwork; Ibrahim...get it done, no?
Once again I am reminded of horses, camels and committees...."

E-MAIL 2
On the same issue...

"Far be it from me to be churlish....but I'll try, 'cos it's what many expect...

Khalil's e-mail the other day threw down a certain sort of gauntlet...which wasn't really picked up on. He wrote:

"I think it would be a good idea to explore the environmental issue and deal with the root cause, as much as possible, of this Global issue. For instance instead of being the "garbage collectors" for big companies, we can tackle the problem of recycling by dealing with the source."

So, Lina forwarded a link to the GS magazine, which featured a nice self-serving article about how 'green' their own parent company, HST, is. I call it self-serving, because that is what it is; frankly, it's a typical example of a dodgy organisation giving itself a green 'makeover' for publicity purposes. A cursory glance at the rest of the magazine, however, gives the lie to this (the very existence of the magazine itself, printed on unrecycled paper and distributed in large quantities, gives the lie to this). Some of the companies they do business with (Timberland, for example) have less than exemplary records in this field. HST, it will come as no surprise to learn, have very high-profile tree-planting campaigns, perhaps knowing full well that new-growth deciduous trees are no replacement for old-growth trees. It's a (what do you Americans call plasters?) 'band-aid' on an amputation... The mall in Amman which they have taken a large amount of space in did a great deal, it seems, to keep quiet the reaction to what was done in order to clear the land that it was built on.

And so it goes...

So part of Khalil's crie de couer (spelling, please?) is for a little bit of joined-up thinking in the school...and...I'm going to say it again...every year our Sister School (whose efforts I never cease to applaud) organise a variety of events, one of which is a raffle, with prizes donated by a variety of organisations, local and global. One of them is a travel agency offering free flights on MEA airlines. I don;t know about you, but I thought the link between carbon emissions from aircraft and environmental degradation was firmly established by now....Might we have a firm look at some of the other organisations that we do business with? Sohat is licenced by Nestle, another company obsessed with its own 'green makeover' to cover up certain practices that they would probably rather we not hear about. Sadly, the list goes on.

So, are we going to take up Khalil's gauntlet...or are we going to let Else's efforts go down the toilet by merely giving ourselves a green makeover for the sake of public relations?"

As you can imagine, there was no response to this, so a few days later I wrote:

"Massive response to my previous e-mail of...zero...nada...rien...tipota. Way to go, people (as my my 'street' American brethren might say....). Are we going to either (i) leave it ALL up to students, or (ii) do sweet FA, or (iii) mumble about 'pragmatism' and 'realism', or (iv) pass it off as me and Khalil going off on another anti-capitalist rant, or (v) go shopping, or (vi) form a task force committee, or (vii) do sweet FA, or (viii) all agree, in a concerned, liberal, way, that 'something should be done', knowing that I won't actually have to DO anything...or what?

There is a term, 'Total Toxic Overload', used to describe the point at which the planet (Earth, I mean) cannot auto-regulate. It seems that, if we haven't already, we will soon reach that point. So, the children we are teaching won't have a habitable planet on which to become lawyers, engineers, social workers, actors, or whatever they want to be. If that seems a little apocalyptic, maybe it is, but don't any of you who don't already have them start having any grand ideas about grandchildren....

But, you know, I'm off shopping. I'm gonna get me a bunch of nice stuff sourced from I-don't-care-where, individually wrapped in paper, and in plastic bags made from oil-based residues, in a foreign country that I had to take a plane to get to, and then I'll have a dinner party so we can all coo over how nice my new purchases are...but, you know, at least the food will be from Souk el-Tayeb, so we can all reassure each other that we're being ethical and supporting local producers.

Or here's a suggestion: why don't we just stop, in the whole school, buying photocopy paper? Me, I love photocopying, I do loads of it. I love it, especially with the paper we use which is VERY dodgy indeed...every copy I make, a tree in Brazil weeps for its cousin...But don't worry, I could do without it, and I'd still find something else to moan about (I have that capacity...); can we, please, turn off the heaters? Can we not have air conditioning in summer, and have fans instead? Mammals sweat, it's no big deal. Never heard of deodorant? Buy roll-on - it doesn't have to be aerosol....What else.....oh yes...let's not have hordes of people flying off on aircraft for spurious reasons to a bunch of foreign destinations. We've got Skype now, so let's have online NESA conferences, and Board meetings. Let's just play badminton, and debate, and have forensics, here instead. What else? Sister School....let's not accept any more gifts that have anything to do with destroying the planet, like airline tickets and weekends in hotels that don't care where they spew their garbage...what else? Here's one: this practice of offering, as part of the employment contract, one return flight home a year to non-Lebanese teachers, let's not have that. Can we, perhaps, have car-sharing for students (and staff/teachers) so that they don;t all roll up in gas-guzzling automobiles, and refuse entry to anybody that tries to turn up in a car with less than four people in it (and while I'm on that subject, all those signs that say 'no parking' in both Arabic and English, why is nothing done about the appalling literacy levels that result in tonnes of parked cars nearly all of the time?). What else...(I'm on a roll here, so go with me..)...ah yes, enough of the out-of-country 'training' workshops for teachers..enough..just, enough, really...If we can't all do what we do without having to do more damage, then perhaps we should just stop...

So, what do you all think...?

I thought not....

So, I'm gonna get me a taxi, to the airport, fly off for the weekend to Oman (random example), buy me a bunch of stuff, exploit a few people in a very liberal sort of way (don't worry), live high on the hog, and then I'll give a few classes, maybe a teach-in, who knows, on the global ethics of climate change. I could even write an article for the school newspaper on how I've been introducing my students to 'global issues in a multicultural world' or something, or...or....I could just carry on as I have been doing. After all, I'm 44 years old, so I can reassure myself that I'm "doing something", because I'm an "educator" (how good is that?!! The ultimate 'get-out-of-jail-free- card!!) secure in the knowledge that, in twenty years or so I'll be dead, which will liberate me from any sort of moral responsibility whatsoever...'cos I'll be dead. Fantastic.

Right, I have to go now...I have to put out my recycling..."

E-MAIL 3
Something happened in the city on the day of this e-mail; something is always happening in this city, but on this particular day it looked for a brief moment as if something more than normally happens could happen. In the end nothing happened; however, here, as you may know, the paranoia dial is set to its default position of 'ape-shit', so what actually happens is irrelevant. Towards the end of the day we received an e-mail from a Senior Administrator. to which my reply was the following:

"They tell us that language is important, that it communicates as much connotationally as it does semantically. As such, I have to say that your choice of phrases leaves something to be desired (and I pick out two) as being a tad militaristic - we offered "dedicated service" and "stayed at [y]our posts." Really, I feel like I have just been awarded the Victoria Cross, or the Purple Heart. I feel like I have been honoured with a campaign medal...
At the same time, I am sure that you did act on the understanding that "At no time did we make any decision where there was confirmed information that it would put students, parents, staff, or faculty into any danger." I have no idea what it is like to be an Administrator, and I am equally sure that the work you do is invaluable, in an objective, realistic schema.
However, it is also the case that (and to quote a previous High School Principal) "perception is truth." Whilst I don't believe this to be so, many do...and today, from my vantage point, what I noticed is this:
* a rapidly dwindling number of students as the day progressed;
* concern, stress, worry, fear...(add your own not-very-nice word in here);
*rumour mill on high alert;
* a complete lack of 'boots on the ground' (to put it into a militaristic metaphor, as seems to be the order of the day...) in terms of Administrator presence (granted, you may have had stuff to do...)...
Enfin, the simple point is this: we had a bunch of teachers, students, staff members, ancilliary employees, who were here doing their thing....and zip from Administration, apart from a late-in-the-day e-mail about how great we all are. We also had a fair bunch of panic, worry, concern, nervousness.
Yes, we also had lots of "teachable moments" (or whatever the jargon phrase is), but we also had.....two schools. One was the school that operates 'up there', assuring us that it's all OK (and, again, I am not doubting that it was a frenetic, realistic day of information-gathering, monitoring, analysis and sound, objectificatory judgement on your collective part). The other school, however, the one where teaching, learning, human interaction, tears, fear, concern, and so on, goes on, I can assure you, had a very different take on the day's events. Days like today are not merely anecdotes that we can take to our graves with us. They are real days where shit hits the fan in the "outside world" (as they call it) (and do not even think to dare to pull me up for using a taboo term...) and human beings have to live with it in the ways they have to live with it.
It's a pity that these two schools never appear to have anything to do with each other.
Maybe we can set up a Task Force to discuss why this is so...
And before I get any private e-mails, or invitations to be hauled over the coals (as we Brits would say), I suggest that you read the words that I have actually written, not the ones you think I have..."

A different Senior Administrator wrote in praise of the first and, as is my wont, I couldn't resist:

"Lots of assurances. Lovely. And to imitate your language, {Senior Administrator 2], I was privy to more of the "front of scene" activity than those with offices, and I can assure you that the students and staff whose safety was your paramount concern would have appreciated a bit more 'face time.'
As I said, 'perception is truth', and, if you believe that, the 'truth' is that a lot of damage was done the other day by the perceived inaction of administrators."

E-MAIL 4
Hilarious. You are aware of all of those forwarded e-mails that people who work in institutions send out, enlightening quotations, pictures of fluffy cats, links to 'inspiring' videos and that sort of thing...some people like and enjoy them, others don't; some delete them, others respond. Such was the case here, and two very good friends (of each other) engaged in a light-hearted spat about one of them, in a public forum. A Senior Administrator thought it was not appropriate, for reasons best known to himself, and wrote:

"Let me be clear. Once you went personal this is came to [the institution's public e-mail system] and this is not acceptable.I need you to change this immediately."

I couldn't resist, so I responded (and I was trying to be nice and diplomatic):

"The following "Once you went personal this is came to [the institution's public e-mail system] and this is not acceptable. I need you to change this immediately" is neither grammatically intelligible - what are the referents of "this" in both sentences? - nor is it intellectually intelligible: as a non-participant in the discussion, I saw nothing "personal" in it - it was colleagues exchanging opinions. All of the exchanges were sent to [the institution's internal e-mail system], not [the institution's public e-mail system] (as was your - supposedly - personal response to the main interlocutors), if, indeed, this is what you mean by "it came to [the institution's public e-mail system]." To repeat, however, the main point, as a disinterested participant in this exchange - I have no dog in this fight, as the vernacular has it - I saw a healthy exchange of opinions on the ways in which altruistic intentions can sometimes have commercial underpinnings. I also saw both (primary) interlocutors moving towards a greater understanding of each other's opinions."

E-MAIL 5
The author of the previous e-mail, a Senior Administrator, has a habit of regaling us all with this thoughts and researches. He occasionally sends out things like the following:

"Good morning this Saturday, March 05, 2011
I Subscribe to [Organisation X] and I am sharing with you an article I thought you might find interesting.
I hope you weekend is going well"

So, you can imagine maybe what my response was like:

"In the spirit of our discussion the other evening, I have to say the following: in an English-medium school, which the American Community School at Beirut is, one would expect the linguistic skills of (especially) senior administrators to be impeccable. After all, such people set the tone for the whole school and are, as it were, the 'public face' of ACS. To that end, I notice that, on the entry page of the website at [our school], "Ken O'connor Webinar' is written thus, an appalling, and basic, error. Your own e-mail is also far from flawless.
I hope you understand why I point these things out. We are often being told that we teachers must be role models for our students; it can perhaps come as no surprise to you that we are not when our own senior administrators fail on so many levels to practice what they preach. It may seem to you pedantic that I point out linguistic flaws but, as I say, we are an English-medium school, and those of us who are native speakers could at least be expected to use our language correctly."

E-MAIL 6
...which I like to describe as "the straw that broke the camel's back"...Private, fee-paying educational institutions such as the one I work for are constantly trying any trick in the book to raise money. Fair enough, one might think...but, occasionally, they go overboard. My school launched, with a full trumpet fanfare, some 'new' 'initiative' or other, with a fancy title and a full-on 'teaser-campaign' - posters everywhere, articles in the school newspaper, the works. Thus, I wrote:

"Colleagues
I only ever speak on my own behalf. This time, however, I shall use the canard of "and I'm not the only one who feels this way" as I have lost count of the number of conversations I have had with colleagues who, well, feel the same way. In that sense, what I have to say is a mere distillation...
On page 23 of the current edition of 'ACS Matters' (or, as it is known by employees, 'ACS Doesn't Matter'...) it is written that "proceeds of the raffle ticket sales contribute to the ACS Annual Fund, which supports...teachers' salaries...".
The various manifestations of the 'Fund Drive' initiative plastered around school (including the big barometer at the entrance to the [Main] Building) all mention "Support Teachers and Classrooms".
From what I have been able to find out (an unscientific survey of school websites, administrators I know in different schools around the world and so on), teachers' salaries are 'ring-fenced' from tuition fees; that is, tuition fees are spent first on salaries, then whatever is left over is spent on other things. Additional fund-raising is then used to support other projects. In short, I haven't come across another instance of a fee-paying school asking for donations from students and parents in order to support teachers' salaries. Whether or not this is in fact practiced elsewhere, however, is an irrelevance.
Quite a few people are a bit put out by it to say the least; it is, after all, tantamount to 'begging' for teachers' salaries; a once noble profession reduced to one where we can only continue to receive salaries thanks to donations, to hoping that kindly individuals may choose to give. It feels a tad like we have been reduced to a parody of Oliver Twist, holding out the porridge bowl and asking "Please, Sir, can I have some more." Please buy a raffle ticket or I won't get paid next month.
Whatever the details (as in X% of teachers' salaries do in fact come from source X and are ring-fenced), (i) these details are unbeknownst to us, and (ii) this is at the very least a spectacular own goal in terms of the ephemeral issue of 'staff morale,' especially when it is so publically paraded."

And so...I was "invite[d] to resign", offered a "soft landing" (to borrow the phrase used on a colleague who was similarly 'invited to resign' a few months ago (you know, 'resign, and X, Y and Z will be forthcoming; otherwise...' - you fill in the blanks yourself and you take the 'soft landing'), and am, to use the jargon phrase, "moving on with my life."

When the institutionality of institutions overrides the reason the institutions were set up in the first place, then something really is rotten in the state of Denmark. When it comes to educational administrators, I am reminded of Charles Dickens' comment on one such administrator: "If he had only learnt a little less, how infinitely better he might have taught much more"